The Dichotomy of Juno

Review: Juno

Sigh. Well a lot has been said about Juno. Critics praise it, fans embracing it. Tons of light has been thrust upon it, and not without good reason. I’ve read many reviews that hail it as “the best movie of the year.” Eighteen to be exact. That’s right. I’ve counted. And with it sweeping up Oscar nods (among them Jason Reitman best director, Ellen Page best actress, and Best Picture) the people behind this 2.5 Million budgeted, over 80 million grossing little gem must be sitting on cloud nine. So right about now is the time (according to my watch) is where the detractors come in. Now before you boo me off the stage, lets get some things straight.

I really enjoyed it. It has some honest to God genuine heart. Which is a blessing in this day in age. Cause as you read this multiplexes are filling up with the likes of 10,000 B.C. (minus Raquel Welch and plus Hal Emerich, so talk about a bad trade) and other dreck. Maybe that’s why so many critics cling to it. If I had to sit through a billion Norbits a year, Juno most certainly would be like finding water in the desert. I’d probably hail it as the second coming. But it’s not. Its just a sweet movie, about a really sarcastic girl who, gets pregnant and decides to have this baby, but give it to the chick form Alias who’s married to the guy from arrested development, and along the way she has some very funny and heart wrenching encounters. Oh and J Jonah Jameson and the CJ form the West Wing are her parents. And it has a totally “indie” soundtrack, most of the songs I already had on my Ipod. And, and…. This should be my movie! This is my bread and butter, people! I should drink this up like Daniel Plainview drinks milkshakes. As a close friend said when I asked him if he had seen Juno, “You mean the movie that’s going to be my favorite movie of the year?” Well it wasn’t his favorite (he feels very much the same way about it that I do) he didn’t love it. And neither did I. And like a scorn lover, I think I kinda resent it for it. I’ve seen it twice now, once by myself, and the second with friends. And I thought the same thing twice:

Man, nineteen year old me would have loved this movie.

But I’m not nineteen anymore, I’m twenty-four. And maybe growing up is hard to do (or is that breaking up?) but I can’t get passed this feeling, that my affection isn’t quite pure for it.

When people look back at 2007 in cinematic terms, I think they will say two things. One, it was the year of the Western (or the varied return there of: Jesse James, No Country, There Will be Blood, and the criminally overlooked 3:10 to Yuma) Second; it was the year of the abortion movies. Or should I say, not abortion movies. Knocked Up, Waitress, and Juno form the trifecta of girls who are going to see this thing through, and man we should laugh at it, and sometimes get misty. On the opposite end of that spectrum is 4 Months, 3 Weeks, and 2 Days which is about a college girl and her roommate actually going to get an abortion behind the iron curtain. Leave it to the foreigners to confront you with dramatic, hard-hitting realism. Over here in America though (where no one will see 4 Months, which came out Jan 25th. Find your local art-houses), we like our non-abortion fantasies. In these worlds, Seth Rogen gets Katherine Heigl, and Michael Cera, Ellen Page. Bravo to those boys. Heigl has an excuse though; she was drunk. Ellen Page, despite this being her first time, apparently didn’t realize Bleaker didn’t have a rubber on. One assumes Juno thought he had one of those “dick skin” condoms Rogen talks about in Knocked Up. You know, the ones where you “hollow out a dick, and put it on.” Sidenote, I loved Knocked Up. I thought it was hilarious, and laughed thoroughly with my friends while watching it in the theatre. I never once tried to bash it for the things its detractors appall (its rampant misogynism) because I never took it for more then it was, a fantasy and a good time.

Juno is a fantasy too because, make no mistake, no sixteen year old girl is Ellen Page. I have a goddaughter who’s thirteen, and she can barely get half the pop culture references I throw around, let alone Juno. And she’s more likely to listen to Britney Spears than Iggy Pop. But then again she’s a real teenager and Juno, is most definitely not. Not even close. And she’s not a three dimensional character either. This is not to undermine the work of Page who deserves the praise, though not an Oscar. What she does is enthuse Juno’s slick slang chick with genuine emotion. I repeat again, genuine emotion. But genuine emotion does not a full form person make. But Page really does make the role her own, and kudos for her, she deserves it.

And I like Jason Reitman too. Thank You for Smoking was an awesome film. It had polish and was funny. This is that plus heart, and heart will always go the extra mile for you. Reitman is a smart young director, and these two films are a fantastic start to what I hope is a long and lucrative career. Juno doesn’t have an easy tone to achieve. Let’s not forget that our little Juno MacGuff is preggers, for shiz. Reitman knows how to strike the proper balance so that we laugh during Juno instead of dreading what this poor girl is gonna do. He also handles, along with the heneedstobeinmoremovies Jason Bateman, a creepy yet sincere man-child relationship with Juno. His place is one of a guy who still wants to be the cool music kid (which oddly enough is akin to the also heneedstobeinmoremovies Paul Rudd in Knocked Up) who isn’t quite ready to accept his adult responsibilities in a world where things didn’t quite turn out as he imagined when he was 20 rocking out to Sonic Youth and watching horror films in his parents basement. Jennifer Garner’s precise, child wanting wife is also a tricky spicket handled with pure grace. If Garner got to show stuff like this on Alias maybe she wouldn’t have had to do Elektra. Or Daredevil for that matter. P.S. I love you Jen. Anyway, Garner takes a role that could be summed up as queen bitch, but it would destroy the service she is for the film. I love Vanessa and Mark’s story. It throws a monkey wrench into what you except would happen in this type of film and is one of the many treasures. Reitman handles his actor extremely well, and knows, after all, that the film is grounded on them. If Page wasn’t half of what she was, this movie would fail. Ditto all the way around. Reitman throws in some nice indie touches and a Wes Anderson-ish track team and some cool tunes and knows how to make the best out of this soup.

I guess where the film goes wrong for me is the script. I know Diablo Cody (great name by the way) is the Hollywood “it thing” now for this. And there is no reason she shouldn’t be. It’s a good effort for a first timer. But it’s just that, a first time. And little things show through. Diablo is being hailed as “the New Tarantino” and that just isn’t so. First off, we really don’t need a new Quentin, we still have mileage on the old one (now if we would only make Inglorious Bastards instead of talking about it) and secondly calling someone “home skillet” does not a Reservoir Dogs make.

Tangent: why does Hollywood always have to reference the new “thing” in reference to the old? Will there every really be “a new Scorsese?” Do we need one for that matter? I wonder sometimes if this was always the case or something that cropped up recently. Was someone “the new Clark Gable” a one point? Maybe I should ask my parents. Anyway…

Some rough patches show through. The first of, and most glaring of which is the films opening 15 minutes in which I (and many critics agree) the film beats you with the “look at me I’m an indie flick” stick until I was as bloody as Billy Bats in the back of Pesci’s car. Seriously. Listen, I’m not some Cassavettes naturalistic snob here. My dialogue doesn’t have to be mumbled out of some non-actors mouth for it to be the shit. In fact I love written dialogue. Sorkin, Taratino, Mamet. The list goes on. I eat that shit up. But I don’t need Dwight from the Office being silenco’ed by someone who has a doodle that can’t be undid. Honest to blog, what kind of fucked up world are we watching? For a minute there I felt like is was in the middle of some weird tangent NYPD Blue-esque universe where no one talks normally and teenagers espouse Phuket, Thailand as an expletive. Have a teenager show you where Thailand is on the map (without using Google) let alone Phuket, and you’ll be quite disappointed. The dialogue isn’t cute, it most definitely isn’t “cool” (because those 15 minutes are quotation mark wanting friends) its just irritating.

But then, something magical happens. Juno tells her parents her predicament and all of a sudden, the fact that her Dad wishes she was into hard drugs instead isn’t annoying. It’s funny, and honest. And suddenly the movie gets tired of tossing out wannabe catch phrases (whether that’s Cody finding the films voice, or Reitman reigning it in we’re all the better for it.) and this little indie that could becomes a pleasure to watch.

And while some might fault the cuteness of the hamburger phone, or the ultra short gym shorts, the film does get more right then it does wrong. For example, a small but simple photo of Juno and Bleaker rocking out on someone’s porch is so true and telling of their relationship that I feel it was pulled form a real photo album, maybe even one of my own.

Maybe it isn’t the film at all that I have beef with, but its packaging. Before I even saw the trailer, at least eight people, critics and the studio were saying that it was “this years Little Miss Sunshine.” Now that offends me. I love that movie I waited months to see it and even journeyed out early one Sunday morning to finally sit and enjoy it in the theatre. And I fell in love with it. As I knew I would. But it was on my own terms, I discovered it for myself instead of having it jammed down my throat. This marketing truly shows how out of touched the Hollywood machine really is with the audience it is playing to. The whole thing about movies such as Juno is the discovery of them. It’s like finding a good band and sharing it with friends. I don’t want to listen to what others tell me is cool; I want to find cool for myself and share it to with the world. Juno was discovered long before I ever laid eyes on it and I really can’t love it like I love its predecessors.

Basically when it comes down to it, Juno is the prom date my parents picked for me. And while she might be all I really need in a girl, it’s just not the same as if I found her myself.